96-Second News: Scarlett Johansson Looks Like A Grandma; United’s New Flight Policies

Author: Lauren Kelly

*A guy on Reddit posted a picture of his Grandma Geraldine from 1967 because she looked exactly like Scarlett Johansson.

In the picture, she’s with her husband, and she told her grandson that she was, quote, “DRUNK AS A SKUNK” when it was taken.

The picture went viral, and it got back to Scarlett, and she loved it. She posted a video saying, quote, “I want to meet you in person.  I saw that you were quote ‘drunk as a skunk’ when taking that photo, and I would like to see your drunk face.  I want to share a drunk face with you.  Let’s have a drink, Geraldine.”

She told Time, “I’m not going to be square.  I’m going to drink with her [and] see if I can drink her under the table.  She has got to remember to take it easy on me.  I’m 40 years older than her.

View post on imgur.com

*Two weeks ago, Dave Chappelle appeared onstage at a John Mayer concert to pay tribute to Charlie Murphy.  He asked everyone to put their cell phones away so it could be a private moment.

Now Dave and John are doing shows 2 together tonight and tomorrow at the Fillmore in San Francisco, and a strict cell phone ban is in place.  People will be forced to put their phones in locked pouches so they can’t use them during the show to record anything.

The shows are called “Controlled Danger“, and they’ll be a mix of music and comedy.

*Kim Kardashian says the Paris robbery was meant to happen to her and she actually sounds grateful for how it’s changed her.

Kim was a guest on Ellen yesterday, and she said the robbers followed her on social media for 2 years as she flaunted her jewelry, cars and other expensive stuff. She says it put a big fat target on her head.


United Airlines settled with Dr. David Dao yesterday, if you recall- he was the passenger who was brutally dragged off his flight earlier this month. According to CNN, Dao’s lawyers did not disclose the settlement amount.

United also just announced major policy shifts for when they want you to give up your seat on a flight:

1.) They’ll offer to $10,000 to people willing to volunteer to give up their seat on overbooked flights now.

2.) If they permanently lose your bag, you’ll get $1,500, no questions asked.

3.)  And once you’re on a flight, you won’t be required to give up your seat, and they won’t bring in cops to remove you, quote, “except in matters of safety or security.”

*The NFL draft happened last night, and the Houston Texans traded their 2017 & 2018 1st round picks to the Cleveland Browns to get this year’s 12th overall pick. They selected quarterback Deshaun Watson out of Clemson with that pick, who led the Tigers to the 2016 National Championship over Alabama.

The Cleveland Browns had the top pick in the NFL draft last night and they went with the consensus #1, Myles Garrett, the defensive end out of Texas A&M.

Texans Trade Up To Take Deshaun Watson 12th

*Dothraki, the made-up language from “Game of Thrones,” is the latest fake language to make it’s way into a new course at UC Berkeley.

“The Linguistics of ‘Game of Thrones’ and the Art of Language Invention,” will be taught for six weeks over the summer by language creator David J. Peterson. UC Berkeley announced the class on its website last week.

In the show, Daenerys (Emilia Clark the queen of dragons) is married to one of the Dothraki leaders, Khal Drogo, and has to learn the nuances of the language in order to communicate with her people and her new husband.

*All-pink Starburst packs are finally in stores! …but only for a month.

Starburst’s parent company, Wrigley, decided to finally release a pink-only bag due to overwhelming demand.

A Wrigley spokesperson said, “Believe it or not, over half of all references to Starburst on social media are about pink Starburst.

The all-pink packages are available in select stores nationwide, including Walmart, Walgreens, Target, Kroger, H-E-B and Amazon.

A 14-ounce bag is $3.19, while the 2-ounce sticks are 99 cents.

*Johnny Depp gave Disneyland fans a HUGE surprise when he showed up on the sidelines of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride dressed as Captain Jack Sparrow.

The new “Pirates of the Caribbean” movie coming out soon, “Dead Men Tell No Tales” and Johnny got back in to character for some promotion inside the classic Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland, totally surprising visitors.

When the boats moved into a grotto, Depp was there along with the animatronics in full ‘Pirates’ character. You can hear the people on the ride totally lose it.

Watch the funny video >>> HERE. 

*Yesterday was a pretty big day for Fall Out Boy and their fans…

The band simultaneously dropped a music video for “Young and Menace” (their first original song in more than two years) and announced a U.S. arena tour that will stop here in Houston at the Toyota Center on Nov. 7th.

In a press release announcing the tour, the band said the “special guest … will be announced at a later date.”

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