It’s that time you only had to do one thing, but you totally blew it! YOU HAD ONE JOB!!!


My story is INTERNATIONAL, coming from Germany! A 29-year-old guy was in a movie theatre. It is unclear if they sold the beer to him there or if he brought it in on his own but what we do know is that he was having some trouble opening it. I have been there. I use my keys at that point. Not this guy! He got his pepper spray out and somehow was trying to use it. Not only didn’t he get his beer open, he busted the pepper spray and 200 people flooded out of the theatre with teary eyes!

Good news is that movie started 30 mins later. Not sure yet if he got the beer open or if he decided to go back in and watch the movie. Guy who just wanted a beer: YOU HAD ONE JOB!


My wife was horrified to find out that one of her new favorite TV shows, Ten Days in the Valley, was cancelled.  ABC is moving it to Saturdays to burn off the rest of the season— aka effectively cancelling it. Series star and executive producer Kyra Sedgwick alerted viewers to the scheduling change Thursday:

She (my wife, not Kyra) accused me of taking the show off our DVR cue and THAT’S why she couldn’t watch the show. But then she saw Kyra’s tweet. I was blamed for a good three days though! Not my fault no one liked that show!! Kyra had ONE job to get people to like her show and she blew it!


A friend of mine had a personalized Astros jersey made for her husband as a birthday gift, but when it came in they ended up spelling his name completely WRONG. Of course he wore it anyways, and now answers to “Brianne” instead of “Brian.”

Jersey-maker-dude: YOU HAD ONE JOB!!!


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